thesettingsun | Recolle IC Inbox

your place, preferably

if you're fine with that.

That's fine with me. Should I tell my roommate to pick up a cleaner that's good at getting blood out of carpet?

jesus christ, don't make this sound like a hit

I'm almost offended you think I couldn't clean up after myself

that's not what this is about, though.

You might have just broken my nose, it wouldn't have to be murder... You can come whenever.

alright, give me a bit

[He doesn't leave Shuji waiting long before he knocks on the door, hat and coat on even in mid July; on the plus side, he doesn't look angry when Shuji answers. He's not here to hit or berate him, at least.]

You've got some time, right? Not about to run off to class or anything?

[Not looking angry is a good sign! Shuji looks a little nervous, but not terrified for his life or like he's going to cry again.]

Plenty of time. And my roommate's out, so we can talk about, you know. Retrospec stuff. Come in.

[His room is relatively neat, and he doesn't have any decorations on the walls, fanboying ones or otherwise. The biggest sign that it's his room is that his bookshelf is absolutely crammed full of books, some textbooks but mostly novels.

There's something that looks like it might be an envelope in between 'Carpooler's Guide to the Universe' and a book on Japanese mythology.]

Sit anywhere?

[He's just gonna sit on his bed.]

[good, please don't cry again, it was awkward...

Chuuya takes a few moments to inspect the room once he's inside, humming to himself as he checks it out-- the potential envelope catches his interest, and he lingers by the bookshelf as he turns back to Shuji with a tiny grin.]

Not a single poster of Baren, huh? I'm gonna have to tell him that, he'll be surprised.

That'd be creepy, I'm not a teenage girl. Or my past self.

[Who absolutely would have done something like that, he's sure.]

Yeah, about that-

[Chuuya turns back to the shelf, pausing for a moment and cutting himself off.]

-actually, wait a sec-- what's this one, huh? I'm not familiar.

[Whatever book he's pointing at, he's picked one Shuji can't see from the bed. C'mere, buddy.]

[He can't see it, so he does indeed come over next to Chuuya to look.]

Oh, that? I had that assigned for one of my literature classes.

[It wasn't bad. Does Chuuya want Shuji to give him book recommendations?]

Yeah? So what were your opinions on it?

[Chuuya's just going to lean against the shelf (carefully, just in case), watching Shuji curiously. There's a plan and an ulterior motive here, he's just waiting for the right opportunity to land.]

Doesn't really look like my usual kind of literature, I'm curious.

Well... I've always liked books about people who are outsiders from society on a fundamental level. The kind of people who aren't outcasts because of anything they did, but they just don't understand other human beings.

[He doesn't have a particular reason why. He just is drawn to that kind of story.]

It's a good book, and I think the plain writing style helps a lot to really sell the narrator as a person without strong emotions about anything.

Hmm... yeah, not sure it sounds like my thing, but-

[-ah, he knows where to go with this. There's a very easy way to distract him, isn't there?

So Chuuya leans in closer, reaches up to brush fingertips over Shuji's cheek, and grins up at him.]

You're still cute when you're into something.

[and he just gives him a quick little kiss, there. That ought to do it.]

[If Chuuya's going for a distraction technique, he's successful.

Shuji's face lights up bright red and he stares at him, wide-eyed but not really processing anything besides that Chuuya just kissed him. He just kissed him while sober and does that mean he isn't mad at him anymore? Maybe??

The building could collapse and Shuji probably wouldn't notice.]

Ah, um...

[Good, just what he figured. While Shuji's distracted, he's just going to nudge him to go sit back down, and as soon as Shuji looks elsewhere Chuuya snags the envelope and tucks it into his coat. He's fairly sure Shuji won't even notice it's not there.]

... literature discussion's not what I came for, though. I need you to do something for me.

[He doesn't notice at all. Even when he snaps out of his daze he probably won't realize, it's not like he takes it out to read very often.]

H-how can I help?

[are they just not going to discuss that kiss

like it was an unimportant thing

used as a distraction tactic or something]

[Chuuya, at least, seems to just be carrying right on like it was no big deal. It's just a thing that happened, sorry Shuji.

With the letter safely stowed away, he takes a seat on Shuji's bed, one leg crossed over the other; it's a moment before he speaks, though, hesitating at first.]

I need you to tell me everything you remember about yourself. About Dazai. And... about your Chuuya.

[Shuji's life is hard.]

...I don't know what order all this happened in, but I'll do my best.

My legal name is still 'Tsushima Shuji', I know that much. I was arrested once for communist involvement, so I'm pretty sure I lived between the nineteen hundreds and nineteen forties, since that's when you could get arrested for that. I remember introducing myself as 'Dazai Osamu' in a library.

I know a Nakahara Chuuya, but he doesn't look like you, or sound like you. We met first because someone encouraged me to get a drink with him, and he spent basically the entire time he was drunk terrifying me. I remember talking to him somewhere else - the place with letters in the sky that Koutarou talked about - and I was still scared out of my wits just by him calling out to me.

I fought monsters with a scythe there, that was weird... I had an illegitimate daughter and was married, and the woman who I had that daughter with wasn't the woman who I committed double suicide by drowning with.

And I remember talking to "Akutagawa-sensei" in that place with the sky letters and being five times as intense a fan as I actually am now. Like, actually to the point where I think it's creepy and pathetic.

[That's pretty bad.]

[His expression's neutral at first as he listens, but the furrow in his brow deepens as he listens, corners of his mouth turned further down. It's sort of what he expected, but-]

Shit. Guess it's a good thing I didn't follow through on punching you.

[He huffs out a sigh, fingers combing through his bangs and brushing them back.]

You're... not my Dazai. He never would've been that scared of me. Didn't use a scythe or have a kid or wife or anything, either-- not that I know of, anyway.

[Shuji couldn't picture himself betraying Chuuya, but past selves can be different from present selves - so he'd accepted that what Chuuya was accusing him of was true.

Now he pauses, and hesitantly asks - afraid to get his hopes up-]

So... you don't hate me anymore?

I don't know what's going on. I figured that was it, y'know? But this place is just set on fucking with us.

[and he's just going to flop onto his back with another huff, because why not make himself comfortable if he has to deal with all of this. He'd been so sure at first.]

If you were never actually him, I guess I never really hated you in the first place. It just- seemed pretty straightforward at the time.

It'd be an easy answer, when we don't have any answers. I'm not mad at you, or anything.

[If he hated somebody that much, he might have done the same. Or, well, something similar, he's not good at threats.]

It's not like you could try to hit me or anything if you were.

[He flashes a teasing little grin up at Shuji, there, setting his hat aside and folding one arm under his head. The other fishes in his coat, plucking the envelope out after a moment and handing it over.]

...if you're not my Dazai, then I'm not your Chuuya, either. So- give that to him if he ever pops up here.

[Shuji accepts the envelope, blinking at it for a moment and then glancing to his shelf to confirm that yep, it's not there anymore.]

When did you even-

[...Oh. His expression falls into 'super done'.]

Did you take it when you kissed me so I wouldn't notice.

It was a bingo square, alright, don't look at me like that.

[In other words: yes. Chuuya just shrugs.]

Besides, if it turned out I was your Chuuya, it technically would've been mine, right?

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